Being A Father

By June this year, it would be the 10th year that I have been married. I must say, lots of things, bitter, sweets, painful and beautiful things had happened to me since then. But the truth is, the marriage was a blessing, indeed the 'miracle' that have changed my life, my views and my vision entirely. I understand more things than before and the purpose of life, the direction that I really wanted for my live became very vivid.

I became a father to a lovely baby girl the next June not far away from the first anniversary of my wedding. Again, the experience changed me, thought me more things that I had never imagined. First, to see the true miracle of God, the creation of another human being through the womb of a mother came to life humbled me. I am grareful forevever to Allah for giving me the opportunity to see it through and to give me the 'light', that human beings are created for reasons, the purpose higher than anything else.

After being a father, I understand the meaning of love, specifically to love someone unconditionally regardless of how the future of her would be. It is amazing and miracolous isn'st it? You give and love someone even before they are born and when they are born you love him or her even more.

I was blessed with two beautiful girls within seven years of my marriage. Then came another baby, a boy that I was hoping for although I would have been grateful regardless to have another child. Not that I love my boy more than my two lovely girls but to become a father to a boy, it gives an additional excitement for two reasons. First, to know that I am going to love and look after someone who you know that will grow up just like you, a boy first and later become a man to live his own life and secondly, it is goin gto be a different exeperience and challenge altogether raising a son. Yes, I was excited, yet I was saying my prayers all to way to Allah as a sign of syukur and then pray to Him to give His blessings (rahmah) to all my children, not only him.

To be where and who I am today, I went through and tasted so far almost every part and parcel of life. Pains, laughters, ups and downs, sweetness as well as bitterness. There are things which I sometimes wish that I didnt have to go through and there we moments that I wish I could have done better. I have done mistakes in my life but to do mistake is human, isn't it? And all those experience thaught me somethings which make me a better person everyday, not only in what I do but also in how I treat other people. Indeed, through those experiences, I became who I am today, not perfect but more humble and wiser.

As a father, I hope and pray for the better for my children and for my son especially because he will grow up going through the same if not similar 'manly' life experiences or passages. This does not mean he will go through the exact same events or accasion as I did. My time is different and his time will be different but the "context" may be similar. I want to give him the freedom to taste his own life with me watching him grow to become a man, a responsible man of course and to be successful in his life. Most important to understand and learn the purpose of his creation as prescribed by Allah. I know for sure it's not easy, but I pray that he will be a man he destined to be. I cant never explain and teach him how, he has to figure it himself. I can give him some opinions and suggestions but that would be based on my life experience, the experienced that may and may not be the same for him.

No word can explain how we love our children. We pray and always wish the best for them. But sometimes we must realise that we can try but we may not get exactly what we want for them. Indeed, God has plans for them and it's only logical that we followed every efforts with doa for them.Insyaallah (God willing), our dreams will come true..